Woe

Tell me not, in mournful numbers,
Life is but an empty dream!
For the soul is dead that slumbers,
and things are not what they seem.
Life is real! Life is earnest!
And the grave is not its goal;
Dust thou art; to dust returnest,
Was not spoken of the soul.

- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

    Tonight the sun raged against the gathering darkness, its torrid eye searing the Western sky with liquid light.  For a few minutes there was no sun, no stars, no sky.  There was only this smoldering phoenix, resplendent in her incandescent wrath.  Slowly, inexorably, this splendid creature of boiling light settled into her funeral pyre.  And then she was gone, leaving the horizon a molten pool whose reflective glory danced off the high cirrus.  Eventually even this belt of light faulted, and the twilight washed over the land like a swift tide.     

     I don’t remember which star first appeared in that vast and empty darkness, perhaps the afterimage of the dying rays of the sun were too deeply imprinted on my retinas for me to perceive it.  I just know that when I looked up again at the night sky was a rich and deep velvet strewn with endless points of cold, diamond light.      

     Our sad little convoy gathered together under that star strewn sky and prepared to make our way to the International Zone.  It would be here that we would pay our last respects to another of our fallen heros,  SGT Jerry Lee Bonifacio Jr.      

     I first had the good fortune of meeting SGT Bonifacio several years ago during a deployment to the sands of Kuwait.  Back then I was still a young platoon leader, and SGT Bonifacio was a fresh faced and motivated team leader.  What I remember most about him wasn’t his determination, although he had that in spades.  What set him apart was his supernatant attitude.  In the hermetic world of the Infantry, where grim faced determination and a cutting wit are the order of the day, SGT Bonifacio was a breath of fresh air.  His heart burned with an ebullience that could not be quenched, his mouth perennially bent into a wide and open smile.  In those dry and cracked months we weathered sand storms that flayed exposed skin… and he smiled.  We suffered through heat as foul as any we have experienced here in Baghdad… and still he smiled.  There were times when our days stretched from one to the other without the solace of sleep… and he smiled on.  And when he smiled it wasn’t the thin, pale crescent of a moonlit night – his smile was stoked by an inner fire as warm and welcome as an open hearth.      

     I didn’t get the chance to see much of SGT Bonifacio here in Baghdad, his company was detached to one of our sister battalions.  But by all accounts he never lost that zeal for life that is so often stamped out by time and pressure.  Where other withered he blossomed, making joy when there was none to be found.     

     The memorial ceremony for SGT Bonifacio took place in the elegant remains of one of Saddam’s palatial buildings.  Rows after row of simple folding chairs cradled his grieving friends, their heads bent in silent reverie.  The orderly rows of chairs were framed by tall fluted columns, as elegant in their fashion as those in the Parthenon.  Groups of soldiers stood beneath these pillars, their eyes fixed on the simple memorial that served as a physical reminder of our painful loss.  During the ceremony SGT Bonifacio’s entire chain of command honored our fallen warrior, their words giving shape and substance to the pain and loss laying heavy in the air.  They were followed by SGT Helk, one of SGT Bonifacio’s closest friends.  He shared his private memories of SGT Bonifacio – the songs he would hum in the mornings, and the way he would blare his radio at the end of a long shift.  He remembered his friend happily thumbing through the latest comic books, or helping some of the other troops defeat the latest video game.  And above all he remembered the deep and lasting optimism that suffused every aspect of SGT Bonifacio’s being.      

     After the ceremony we walked back to our HMMWVs in silence.  I think the stars were still shining somewhere in that black vault.  I don’t know.  I didn’t care to look.  The inky darkness seemed a better arbiter of my mood. 

      Please keep SGT Bonifacio and his family in your prayers.

Comments

[Ben Randall]

You have a wonderful gift Capt. Bout. Your words are filled with compassion and love. Such depth can only be expressions of the heart. Thank you for allowing us to meet SGT Jerry Lee Bonifacio in a real and personal way. I am a pastor in SGT Bonifacio’s home town of Vacaville, California. I will be participating in the upcoming memorial service, and plan on meeting SGT Bonifacio’s family tomorrow. I wish to present your words to them and ask if it might be read during the celebration of his life. If I do not hear from you, I will assume I have your permission. I speak for my church, our community, and myself when I say we are so very proud of all of you, and we will not cease to hold you all up in prayer. Thank you for all that you do! May God richly bless you and bring you home soon. Pastor Ben Randall

[Carlos Villatoro]

Thank you for writing this. We all knew Sgt. Bonifacio here in his hometown of Vacaville and are still mourning his loss. The way you described him was right on the money. Jerry was always that way, day in day out. We had a candlelight vigil last night for him and I wish I would have stumbled upon this web site so that I might have read your testimonial to the group of about 150 mourners. Again, thanks for writing this.

[devildog6771]

T6, no one could offer a finer tribute to a fallen soldier or loved one any better than the one you have written. Your words immortalize Sgt. Bonifacio far better than any others. They are the words of the love of one brother for his fallen brother in combat. Thank you for sharing some part of the Sgt. with us so that we may know something of the brave man we mourn with you. May God bring comfort and support to the family of Sgt. Bonifacio. May the Sgt. rest in peace at the right hand of God. May his brothers and sisters in harms way know we share their pain and grief. God Bless you all. Stay safe. May God look over you all. Thank you all so very much for the terrible sacrifices you make every day. Thank your families. Know this! There is nothing any of us back home could ever say or do to show the gratitude owed to you all! We can only make our feeble replys of support and love. But they are all from the heart.

[CJ]

Right here praying.......and caring.

[Ken]

My prayers are with you and your fellow soldiers. Words can't convey the loss that one feels when a fellow soldier loses his or her life. May the winds of good fortune blow and your sails be full as you continue on your journey across the sands of time. ken

[Guy]

T6...I could never put into words what my heart feels so deeply. May God bless you and those that serve alongside you.

[Kevin]

"I don’t remember which star first appeared in that vast and empty darkness"............................ Venus. It's always Venus.

[Weaser]

Absolutely, SGT Bonifacio is in our prayers. I am so sorry Danjel to hear you have lost another comrade. You are all in our prayers, along with prayers for a favorable vote Saturday.

[June]

My heart goes out to SGT Bonifacio, his family and all of our troops who continue to sacrifice for the rest of us. GOD BLESS you all for all you do.

[Navigator]

Earth has no sorrow that Heaven cannot heal. Stay safe T6, and take comfort in giving hope and freedom to people long oppressed.

[HomefrontSix]

Praying. For all of you.

[Beth* A.]

Starlight. Seems right for such a bright soul. Jamie Good offers a fitting notion. You brought SGT Jeri Lee Bonifacio, Jr. the person to all of us, T-6. Thank you for sharing a little of him with us, so that we may always remember: not numbers but human beings are out 'there' risking everything. Everything. Prayers going out tonight for his family, and prayers continuing for all of you.

[Portia]

God bless you, sir. You and the rest of the brave troops are in my prayers. SGT Bonifacio's sacrifice will not soon be forgotten. You all make me proud to be an American May God keep you through your tour.

[kelly]

deaR t-6, my heart and prayers are with you and your troops, please send along my prayers, sorrow ,thanks and admiration to the family of Sgt Bonitacio. You are all HEROS.

[MissBirdlegs in AL]

May God Bless you all, T6...

[Lorene]

Another Soldier stands guard at the Gate. RIP SGT Bonifacio. My prayers are with your family and the Brothers you've left behind.

[lometa]

Here is an essay on "Vigil strange I kept on the field one night" by Walt Whitman Something I wrote not long ago. May it bring you some solace along with my deepest condolences. http://lometa.blogspot.com/2005/01/vigil-strange-i-kept-on-field-one.html

[Yankee PaPa]

..Done..and sleep well SGT. Bonifacio..Your Brother In Arms..Semper Fi..

[Kat in GA]

You write so very beautifully ~ and my heart goes out to all of y'all for your loss. I'm crying along with you ~and you all are very much in my thoughts and prayers always. {{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}

[Jamie Good]

I have said this before, but it still apllies, especially as you sit there tonight and struggle to look at the stars: Perhaps they are not the stars, but rather openings in Heaven where the love of our lost ones pours through and shines down upon us to let us know they are happy. —Inspired by Eskimo Legend. Don't deny the SGT the smile he was known for, a look at the stars, the touch of a hand...you are wished whatever comforts you.